Turning 38: Five Lessons I'm Taking Into This Next Year

Birthdays always make me reflective.

If you know me, I’m a big list kind of girl. I love to make lists of goals and resolutions, to-do lists and lists to help record life. I turned 38 yesterday and I am excited about the year ahead. This year feels full.

Full of lessons I wish I'd learned sooner, confidence I didn't have in my twenties, and a growing understanding that life isn't about squeezing more in, it's about making room for what matters.

Here are a few things I'm taking with me into this next year.

Stepping into 38 with a full heart and four shots of espresso!

1. Putting my phone down helps in almost every situation.

I will be the first to admit I am addicted to my phone. Part of it’s my job but there' is also just a part of me that constantly reaches for it.

Waiting in line.
Sitting on the couch.
Even during those little moments when nothing is happening.

But I've noticed something over the past year: almost every time I choose to put it down instead, something better happens.

I pay attention to my kids a little more. I actually finish a conversation. I notice the sunset. My mind feels quieter.

The world keeps spinning without me checking one more notification.

I'm not aiming for perfection—my phone is part of my work—but I do want to be more intentional about when it's in my hand and when it isn't. My Brick helps a lot with that. It’s a tool that literally blocks the apps that are most addicting (for me, that’s social media). But I just need to remind myself to put it on every night. (I have a code for 10% off! ALEXIS60392)

2. Making time for myself really is that important…

I am not good at taking me time. There’s always something that needs to be done. An email to answer, an invoice to set out, a load of laundry to fold.

The problem is...everything is never done.

I've learned that even an hour to read, take a walk, grab coffee alone, or simply sit in silence changes how I show up for everyone else.

I have more patience.
More creativity.
More energy.

Turns out, filling your own cup really does make a difference. I shared a few ways earlier this year about outsourcing and I am trying to lean into that more as the school year approaches.

3. We can do all the things—but not all at the same time.

This one has probably been the biggest lesson.

There are so many things I want to accomplish. I want to grow my business. Be present for my family. Travel. Exercise. Read more books. Keep a clean house. Cook dinner. See friends.

None of those goals are impossible.

But expecting them all to happen perfectly in the same season? That's where I get into trouble.

Life has seasons.

Some seasons are for building.
Some are for resting.
Some are for family.
Some are for chasing big dreams.

I've stopped expecting balance every single day and started appreciating balance over time.

4. Do the thing you've been putting off.

You know the thing.

The doctor's appointment.
The closet you've been avoiding.
The email.
The project.
The trip you've been saying you'll plan "someday."

Almost every time I finally tackle something I've been avoiding, I wonder why I waited so long. Like I FINALLY took things to Goodwill the other day…it took minutes. Why had the bag sat in my trunk for so long?

The anticipation is usually worse than the actual task.

This year I want to stop letting little things take up so much mental space.

5. Stop saying yes to everything.

I used to think saying yes meant being helpful.

Now I realize every yes is also a no to something else.

Sometimes it's a no to family dinner.
Sometimes it's a no to sleep.
Sometimes it's a no to my own peace.

As I stepped away from news and into building my own business, this has been one of the biggest life lessons over. the last year. I said yes to so many things because I didn’t know what I was doing, I didn’t know who would say yes to my ideas so I said yes to everyone. That led to some serious burnout. Now I lean into the idea that if it’s not a HELL yes, it’s a no. Or at least a not right now.

Not every opportunity is my opportunity.

And that's okay.

Goals for 38

Instead of creating a long list of resolutions, I'm focusing on a few simple habits that I think will make this year feel more intentional.

• Journal more. Even if it's just a few sentences each day, I want to remember this season of life instead of letting it blur together.

• Finally make scrapbooks. My phone is filled with thousands of photos that deserve to become something tangible my kids can flip through years from now.

• Create better systems for the school year. Less scrambling, fewer forgotten forms, and routines that make life a little calmer for everyone.

Nothing groundbreaking.

Just small changes that I hope add up to a life that feels a little less rushed and a lot more present.

Here's to 38.

I'm grateful for every lesson, every challenge, every unexpected turn, and every person who's been part of this journey.

I don't have everything figured out.

But I know more than I did a year ago.

And that's a pretty great place to start.